11.04.2009

I started out poor but ended up rich!

Today was such a struggle for me. I woke up at 6 am, like normal, and got ready for my day not knowing if I would work or not. Struggle number one ... I don't think people understand how nerve racking it is to go to bed each night not sure if you'll work the next day or where or what group of kids you'll be with and what you'll be doing. For some people that may be fine. People that enjoy spontaneity and flying by the seat of their pants. Well anybody that knows me knows that's NOT me. I live by a calendar and a time schedule. So yes, that would be struggle number one for today.

I ended up not having to work today which is fine. I enjoy my days off (most days). I thought I'd take time to finish up some projects that I had started. I am working on a Christmas tablescape for my dining room and one thing I am making are glasses with etched snowflakes on them. I got out all the stuff for making the glasses and I realized I had no masking tape. Guess that project would have to wait until later.

Then I pulled out my centers that I began making while student teaching and I thought I'd work on putting those together to use for tutoring when I start that this month. After getting all the papers sorted and organized, I remembered I didn't have any more folders. Again, another project to wait until later.

At this point, I was out of ideas. I read for a little bit. Watched a little T.V. Emptied the dishwasher. Then it was 11am ... I had the whole day ahead of me with nothing to do. It seemed that everything I really desired to do (shop, go out for lunch, make art, decorate my house) all required money. Money that Sam and I don't have. I spent the entire day bored and bummed because we don't have money to spend on new shoes or a new bedspread.

Since when did I become so materialistic?

I have always struggled with boredom. Just as my mom. I'm an only child. We can't entertain ourselves all the time. But when I was little I would color or make jewelry out of flowers. I would put on a CD, dress up, and sing into my hairbrush and pretend to be Reba. In high school, we would spend hours circling our mall maybe buying a $5 pair of earrings. Or we would watch our favorite movies over and over again.

Today, I could not satisfy my boredom. I spent all my energy blaming our finances. I wasted a day pretty much that I could have spent with my husband fishing or taking pictures or playing a game or trying out a new recipe. I wish I could start the day over and learn from my silly decisions. I need to spend less time desiring what I don't have and more time enjoying what I am blessed with!

Romans 10:12 " ... the same Lord is Lord of all and richly blesses all who call on Him ... "

I refuse to believe that I am poor for the Lord has made me rich!

3 comments:

Emerly Sue said...

This is a precious lesson and I love you!

Amanda said...

Check out my new layout! I wish I could make the picture bigger ... any tips?

Rachel and Matt said...

i'm so glad i have stumbled on your blog. how great it is to hear your heart in this special way. i miss you a lot, amanda. honors college isn't the same...love you!

Followers